You Can't Make Two Out of One
by RyleeBeth
Summary: He loves the both of them so much, just differently. Takes place after iOMG. Creddie; heavy one-sided Seddie, Sibby.


_This is for all the Creddie shippers out there. There is still a chance for our ship (although admittedly it's gotten a lot smaller) and I just wanted to write something off of the last episode._

Sam kisses him. She puts her hand back behind his shoulder and flings herself upon him, lips first, in a fit of passion. She's following his words exactly, and he can't blame her. He told her to make a move, but he didn't know that she had feelings for him. As she kisses him, he doesn't really know what he's feeling. He thinks he feels nothing, but he can't be sure, because he feels Sam's lips moving against him. Still, he doesn't feel the rush Carly's lips send through him, and he becomes scared.

"Sorry," she says, blushing and looking down.

"It's cool," he says, because really, she just confirmed everything he'd been running from. The clarity came with pain.

.

"So, are we dating now?" Sam asks the next day, trying to appear to be tough and unconcerned, when really he can tell he's got her feeling weak, and he hates it.

Really, it was typical of Sam to ask him like that. He wishes he could have caught Carly first, so he could talk to her before facing Sam, because without her help, he's about as strong as Sam was at that moment.

"Sure," he says, taking her hand and feeling nothing but fingers intertwined with his.

.

He doesn't see Carly for approximately five days and ten hours since Sam kissed him, which was horrible because even though it made him feel guilty to admit him, he needed her more than ever. When he "accidentally" bumps into her in the lobby, he can't even open his mouth before she's talking.

"I saw you and Sam kiss."

It's a statement that's heavy in the suddenly thick air. Carly feels like she's suffocating, like she used up all her air saying those powerful six words.

All he can do is nod.

All Carly can do is walk away.

.

Sam isn't stupid. She doesn't know that he still loves Carly, but she does know that the two have a history, and she isn't about to let him slip away so easy. Something about the way Carly wishes the two of them the best worries her. He finds the amount of time he spends with just Sam rapidly increasing, the time he spends with the whole iCarly trio decreasing, and the time he spends with just Carly completely escaping him.

.

"When are you and Carly going to make up?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Sam, every time we're all together I can feel the tension between you and Carly, and you always try to keep me away from her, what's up?"

"I think you can figure that one out."

.

Sam slips up on her perfect monitoring of her boyfriend and her best friend and is late to iCarly rehearsal one evening. He lives across the hall and is naturally on time, giving Carly and himself ten minutes all alone. Spencer isn't there, and all the feelings he's been trying to get rid of come back to him (they've never really been gone) as they sit on the couch together, a few feet apart.

"How are things going with Sam?"

"Can we please not talk about that?

"I miss you," slips out from Carly's lips before she can stop herself.

"I miss you too," he says, all kinds of guilt washing through him.

He feels guilty for the pain shone in her eyes, and guilty for missing her too much.

He silently admits to himself that he's in love with Carly and isn't in love with Sam.

.

Sam complains about the way Carly looks at him, not being brave enough to confront him about how he looks at the girl. He says he has no idea what she's talking about, stifling the hope that he really shouldn't feel. He's not going to tear the girls' friendship apart. Besides, Carly probably just misses the friendship that he and her shared.

.

He sits next to Carly in physics (the one class the two have together without Sam). They don't talk like they used to, but some days, it feels like the old times.

"Do you think Adam might still like me?"

"Trust me, he still does," he says a little too quickly, and from the look on Carly's face, she knows exactly what he means.

"You love Sam."

.

His mom doesn't approve of him dating. He doesn't blame her, because really, he doesn't approve his new romance either.

.

He's not one to drink, but he and Sam go to a party one time and he's curious about all the colorful liquids. He knocks back something bitter and something sweet, and it's enough to make him screw up his act. When he and Sam start making out, he pretends she's someone else. He swears and he and Sam would have had sex had he not called her Carly.

.

He doesn't know whys he hasn't broken up with him yet. He plays the role of the perfect boyfriend, but she's got to have figured out that he doesn't love her as anything more than a friend by now. Still, Sam clings to him, and it makes him feel sick. Love shouldn't be so hard. Why couldn't the girl who was so in love with him be the one he was in love with?

.

Weeks turn into months and months turn into year. It's been a year since he's been dating Sam Puckett, and it's been a year since he's been lying to the two girls he loves. One he loves as a friend and one he loves as the soul he wants to be with even after the end of time. He wishes he could switch his feelings around.

.

He thinks the world should have let him fall in love Sam by the time Senior Prom rolls around. Sam looks beautiful, he can't deny it, but he still can't feel anything when he kisses her. He tries, over and over again that night, but each time he feels nothing. He's never felt so guilty in his life when Carly arrives with Adam. He's absolutely sure that she's the most beautiful thing _ever_ and here he is, kissing Sam over and over again. Sam must think he's completely in love with her. He thinks he's disgusting.

.

The day Carly prepares to head off to college is the day Carly comes barging onto his apartment. He can tell she's been crying and he moves to touch her, to comfort her, but she moves away from his embrace. She's promised herself that she would stay strong until after she's said what she needs to say.

"Look, I know we haven't really talked at all the past two years, but I have something that I need to say before I leave. I love you. I am completely in love with you. All the times I rejected you were because I was afraid of things changing you. I felt safe within our friendship, and I thought playing it safe was better than losing you if a romance went wrong. Well I was wrong, ok? I let you slip into Sam's arms. I knew she had feelings for you, but I honestly didn't think that you returned them. It's really sick that two girls would fall in love with one guy, isn't it? Sam was my best friend and by the way she's been acting she knows what this is doing to me. She can't hate me for doing this."

"For doing what?" he asks, stunned and elated by her words.

"Saying goodbye," she says, before she does exactly what Sam did two years ago.

She presses her lips to his and Freddie _finally_ feels what he's supposed to. The rush, the happiness, the thrill, the love all runs through him. He has Carly, he finally has her… and then she's gone.

.

He's one hundred percent aware that Carly Shay is the love of his life when he cordially invites her to the wedding of Freddie Benson and Sam Puckett. He writes a little note on the bottom of her invitation when Sam's not looking. (The only reason Sam allows her to be invited is because not letting her would show that she feels threatened.)

_It's up to you if you come or not. Actually, this impending marriage is up to you._

.

He really doesn't want to hurt Sam, but when Carly shows up to the wedding, he doesn't know if he can trust himself. He can't take his eyes off her in that lavender dress. She could be wearing sweats and he still wouldn't be able to take his eyes off of her. His heart shatters when she doesn't make any move to stop the wedding. She's clearly made up her mind. Sam proceeds down the aisle toward him, her face expressionless. When the priest asks if there are any objections, his bride-to-be speaks up.

Her only words are "Carly Shay."

.

Before he and Sam say goodbye to their romance she asks if he ever cheated on her. Sighing, he tells her about the time he and Carly kissed before she left for college. He tells her about how she said Sam couldn't hate her for it. Sam admits that she hates what Carly's done, but that she really can't hate her. Sam says she knew she was just delaying the future and that he had feelings for Carly the whole time.

"Sam, I'm sorry."

"I know you are."

.

"You've moved on, haven't you?"

"Whatever makes you think that?"

"You didn't try to stop the wedding."  
>"I didn't want to hurt Sam, but it didn't exactly work out."<p>

"She said she doesn't hate you."

"She should hate me now. I'm a horrible person."

"I disagree. I think you're the best and most special person in the world."

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

.

Sam shows up to their wedding with Gibby, and finally, everything has worked itself out.


End file.
